This question came up recently on X and a lot of people weighed in with good suggestions such as it being in women’s erratic, emotional nature. All of them fell short, though, because I think that girl’s flaking will always be interest based. If a girl is interested enough then she’ll show up for a date. Even if she can’t make it that particular evening she’ll reschedule in good faith and be determined to show up next time.
When a girl is uninterested, she’ll be indifferent towards disappointing you. Flaking is driven by low interest but the opportunity for flaking to happen in the first place is driven by women’s conflict avoidant nature. Better to say yes now and then no later when it’s safe.
I think it’s difficult for beginners to accept this because it brings out, into the harsh light of day, the sheer level of rejection involved in pick-up and the realisation of low value. The truth is that if you’re trying to make something happen then you are naturally pushing things at the margin. You’re not just waiting for the juiciest opportunities to fall into your lap, “that one night at the bar/club where you felt supremely confident” or the girl who has been carefully selected for you for years from your social circle.
So the next time a girl flakes on you you have to own up to the fact that she just wasn’t interested enough in you for the level of investment you were asking from her:
- A coffee date is low investment and so requires lower interest
- An evening drinks date is medium investment and so requires medium interest
- An invite straight to yours in extremely high investment and so requires extremely high interest
Then there’s the context. In SMP’s which are more efficient at connecting women with their hypergamous ideals, the competition for each girl is stiffer. Many women are competing for one, hawt man, rather than fewer women competing for that one man and the remaining women competing for the best beta available. In those efficient SMP’s you require relatively more interest for any level of investment.
If you want to learn how to actually generate interest in women and start to realise some actual high value, follow the links below.
Yours unfaithfully,
Thomas Crown
> Buy the best of Thomas Crown, Volume One
> Buy the best of Thomas Crown, Volume Two
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Thomas Crown PUA 