I’ve found that as I’ve progressed along this journey, the amount of blue pill friends I have has gone way down. And not even just the proportion of friends who are blue pill, but the total number. The red pill really does switch you from wanting one girlfriend and lots of friends to lots of girlfriends and one friend.
It’s not that I don’t like them anymore, it’s just that we have less and less to talk about. All I want to talk about is Game and men and women. Maybe, just maybe, some sport will creep in there too. If I do manage to slip into my groove and go off on one, their eyes quickly glaze over and my conclusion is met with a hazy “I’ve… errr… never thought about it that way”. If what I said contends with the person’s point of view I might even get a sarcastic “you’ve thought about this too much”.
It boggles my mind that they haven’t paid much thought to what is the most important thing in their lives.
And so I either stay to the side of join in the mundane conversations and twist them to absurd levels. I’m the sort of person with an on and off switch when it comes to interest. When I’m interested, it’s all systems go and turbo mode engaged. When I’m uninterested, I like to lead the conversation on a merry chase into the surreal, bringing to light just how meaningless it is.
My other problem with blue pill friends, (although I should say “issue” because it’s not a negatives of theirs character but instead a side-effect of their own interests) is when they ask you what you’ve been up to.
“So, how was your weekend?”, they may ask.
If I was being honest, I would reply: “I approached twenty girls in the street trying to get their numbers. Then I had a date with a girl but I dirty talked her too much; she was loving it but now she’s blocked me. Then on Sunday I fucked one of my regulars and spanked her until she was screaming my name”. (I remember in one the Krauser podcasts this comes up too).
Here’s the real world reply: “Not much. It was pretty relaxing. Watched football”. Snore.
Here’s another example which happened on Monday. It was with a girl I’d already fucked but you can still see how bizarre the answer is to a normal person.
“So, what are you reading?”.
“I’m reading Pimp: The Story of My Life by Iceberg Slim. It’s actually a great book”.
What is the silver lining here (because there is one)? They give you perspective as well as perhaps (perhaps!), being good company.
The women we are hitting on come from this world. Even though they might instinctively know the truth, they will still verbally toe the party line, so it’s important to know what that line is.
Watch how they jockey for status and how they choose to show their value. Do the opposite.
Listen to their beliefs about dating and romance. Do the opposite.
Watch how they deal with the women in their lives. Do the opposite.
I’ll give you another example. I told someone at work the story of how Martina blocked me and my theory as to why. This guy, let’s call him Blue Pill Bill, has a great puppy dog face. I just want to share my secrets with him and I feel that I can trust him to keep them.
When I told him about the blocking he smiled, put a friendly hand on my shoulder (he’s at least 10 years older than me so I was fine with the fatherly vibe), and said “man, that sounds perfect”. Bill described what he meant more, and I found out that he was basically alluding to a bait and switch except without the bad feelings arising from the “switch”.
He was implying that the blue pill mindset is that a man has to offer monogamy, or at least pretend to offer it, to get sex.
Over the past year and a half I’ve been whittling down the people in my life.
Daygame provided a two pronged attack. Firstly, I didn’t need guys to go out with in the nighttime and I only needed a couple of wings. Secondly, I built my SMV around myself as a single entity rather than social status.
Next you have environment: I graduated a few years ago and it’s natural to be less sociable afterwards. University puts you in the middle of a thousands of people your age and your group of friends increases, but then that proximity ends and most of those people fade away.
Then I have my own circumstances. I’ve already touched on how the range of conversational topics dwindled, but also my breakup loomed over large social gatherings, reducing them too.
At the end of the day, am I sad about it? No.
I’ve cut away all the fat in my life so that I only talk to people who I actually want to talk to. They are the small nucleus of loyal friends that I want. I’d rather have three or four close friends with whom I could discuss anything, than be a social butterfly who felt obliged to people he felt lukewarm about.
And yet I score as an extrovert… Go work that one out.
2 thoughts on “Social Circles”
This is a great article. I’ve noticed that too a bit when I started in game. I entertain the thought often of grabbing drinks with former work mates or college friends, but an afternoon or evening getting drinks with these guys is time lost on hunting.
I still have my two best friends in high school. One has gone on the game journey with me-he is a good-looking guy who has finally cashed in on those looks by running a ruthless smash n grab game on tinder (if the girl doesn’t sound dtf on the first date, he removes the match). The other friend, though he understands the biological workings of actual human sexual relations (he’s studying to be a doctor and loves science), I think of him as practical bluepill as he has made a conscious decision to be content with a couple mediocre looking girlfriends in life so he can focus on medicine and making boatloads of money. I do believe he will be legitimately happy that way, though I do remind him if he put his singular drive on nailing women or at least overcoming AA, he would do respectable work.
I am preparing for my mother to start nagging me when I’m 31-32 as to why I won’t be settled down by then (I’m 23). I lost out on too much YHT in university and will make up for it 20-fold as time can be very much on a man’s side.
That last paragraph… We’re coming from very similar backgrounds. I left university with N=3 and a LTR.