The main thing holding regular guys back from improving their dating life is that they simply don’t know how to “go for it.” Each man has a list of dating regrets – his “what-if’s” – where he didn’t know what to say or do; if he could relive that experience, he might have, maybe probably would have, slept with that girl. I certainly have my own experiences in this regard. However, what if he doesn’t want to “do Daygame.” He doesn’t want to “crush his approach anxiety” and finds the idea of methodically approaching women and learning to improve as “icky,” “gross” or maybe even downright misogynistic. This is the post for that guy.
The inspiration for this came from my upcoming podcast with Julius which will be released before the end of the month. One thing we talked about was how pre-Daygame Julius had had success every now and then in Daygame-esque situations: waitresses, random encounters in the street, as a tourist, etc. It’s important to know, as well, that Julius is an average looking guy: not average in the sense that the average American is obese, but average in the sense that he’s healthy, average height and has neither an ugly nor extremely handsome face (sorry!). That is, average looking when you imagine “average looking.”
What’s interesting to guys like myself is that his approach to lay ratio, roughly calculated from his time pre-Daygame (capital D), is pretty damn good: eight lays in 350 approaches; 44:1. That’s better than Krauser claimed to have gotten during his time in London (50:1). So is Julius better at Daygame than Krauser? I hope he won’t mind me saying that he’s not; there’s more to unpack here.
When you try to make something happen, you often make it less likely to happen. Or, at least, you have to put in a lot more effort to make it happen. The big difference between Krauser’s London stats and Julius’ pre-Daygame stats is that Julius’ came from something like 10-15 years of approaching here and there and not mass approaching in London for a few years. Some of his pre-Daygame lays came in South America where he had a certain level of exoticness and status advantage as an American.* Julius wasn’t “trying to make it happen” and was just living his life and seeing what opportunities came up. His ratio was better because he was being a sniper rather than spraying bullets far and wide. So let this be a little disclaimer for those guys who don’t want to “do Daygame:” you won’t become a player through this method, unless you actually had a tonne of value already and simply weren’t applying it at all. However, for average guys, you will still considerably improve your dating life because you’ll actually be putting yourself out there.
* Just because you’re a white European or American doesn’t mean that South America is pussy paradise. The golden rule of the SMP still holds: high value women sleep with high value men. It’s just that in these countries some girls may perceive your SMV as higher than some girls at home.
I asked Julius to send me a quick description of each pre-Daygame Daygame-style lay and I’ve categorised them for you here and given you advice on how to do them:
Moments of Madness (Actual Direct Approaches):
Every now and then guys will feel really confident, and, compared to their usual existence, a bit mad. When you’re in this mood and you have the sudden courage to talk to a girl, walk over to her and say this:
“Excuse me, I know this is crazy but I thought you were really cute and I wanted to say hello.”
Then introduce yourself and talk to her for a few minutes. At the end ask:
“I’d love to stay in touch. Can I get your number or your Instragram?”
Random Encounters (Meet Cute):
Whenever a woman starts talking to you randomly then take it as a sign that she might like you, for example, if a woman asks you for directions or where to find something in a supermarket. If you find her attractive as well, then run the same script as above.
Random Observations:
One of Julius’ pre-Daygame lays came from teasing a girl for not sharing her umbrella with him. You could make similar observations and little comments throughout your everyday life. For example, you’re standing in line at a bakery and a cute girl is next to you so you comment on how delicious the cakes look. In these Random Observation encounters, if her energy appears to spike once you start talking to her, then take that as a sign she might be interested in you and flip to the usual script.
Massive IOI’s
Even a clueless guy can spot massive green lights: if a girl stares at you or smiles at you, then she likes you. Go over and just start talking to her about literally anything. I mean it: anything at all. Then ask for her number/Instagram at the end of the conversation.
*****
If you can do the above then I predict you’ll see a big improvement in your dating life. The problem, though, is that just having a phone number doesn’t get you far. You have to actually do something with it. So here are my last pieces of advice:
Texting
A couple of hours after you met her send her this message:
“Hi [NAME]. Fun meeting you earlier. How was the rest of your day/evening?”
I’m sure some Game afficionados will be cringing at that message but they shouldn’t be. That’s a perfectly fine message to send to a girl when you’re just living your life and waiting to see which opportunities come your way.
If a conversation ensues then see it through. The next day, send a picture of what you’re up to, for example, your morning coffee with a nice view behind it and a caption of:
“Best coffee in [LOCATION]. How’s your morning going?”
If she responds to that then ask her out:
“Let’s grab a drink sometime soon. How’s [DAY]?”
On a Date:
Then once you have a date agreed with that girl, select a pub or bar where you can sit close to each other. A right angle or next to each will work. Start talking to her and after 45 minutes:
Ask to see some rings or to compare hand sizes.
After another 15 minutes:
Concoct some reason for her to sit closer to you. For example, because you can’t hear her properly.
After another 15 minutes:
Try to kiss her by gently tipping her towards you by placing your hand on her lower back.
Then at the end of the second drink:
Ask her “can I invite you back for one last drink?”
*****
It’s as simple as that and I refuse to go into any more detail. If you don’t want to “do Daygame,” then you can at least do this and improve your dating life. However, if you do want to develop some actual skill and get a lot more indepth advice then check out the links below.
Yours unfaithfully,
Thomas Crown
If you enjoyed this post and want to support me in making future content then please consider buying one of my books or hiring me for coaching. Follow me on X for daily updates and listen to my podcast – The London Daygame Podcast – on Spotify. Click on the links below to find out more.
> Buy the best of Thomas Crown, Volume One
> Buy my beginner’s guide to Daygame
Thomas Crown PUA 