29/30: K Greek Architect

I number closed Christina on Tuesday. Half Greek and half English but with a strong, dark Mediterranean look. We agreed to a first date today (Sunday). She seemed like a bit of a frame stealer over text, but in person her behaviour was much better. I don’t know whether it’s because my teases to her frame grabs were appreciated or whether she’s just inexperienced (more on that later).

We were supposed to meet for an evening date but she asked if we could meet earlier as it was Father’s Day and she was having dinner with her family. I wanted to just get in front of her so accepted the change in time and accepted that this date wasn’t going anywhere near sex. Instead, my aim was to tease her and establish a dominant frame, and go for the kiss in the second venue.

We had our first drink in a pub, then went down to a cocktail bar for the second. I went for the kiss there, but she said she didn’t kiss on first dates. So after having my kiss attempt rebuffed, I had to choose what to do. I could retry for the kiss, but my gut was telling me that it wasn’t a good idea. That’s not very alpha! Okay, but it’s a mid-afternoon date which isn’t going to lead to sex because of her logistics. Getting the kiss now, or on a future date, is immaterial, so I went for the covert option and took her hand into mine and stroked it with my thumb. She reciprocated. All is good.

She then went on to describe how she was looking for “something serious” and didn’t like the boys her age because they were “only after one thing” or “didn’t know what they want”. She’s 22, and they’re clearly just doing what comes naturally to them (she guessed that I was 28). She asked me why I was single and about my last relationship. I flipped the “why are you single” question back to her and she pretty much repeated what I had said (that she was picky). She said that her last relationship ended because she wouldn’t have been able to introduce her boyfriend to her parents. I actually followed this up with the “when did you last have sex” question and she wouldn’t answer me. Hmmm…

Speaking on the topic of relationships was a tricky one, because I had warring desires in my head. On one side, I don’t want to lie because I am not going to enter an exclusive relationship (open ones suit me fine). But I also want the lay. I settled on a murky grey area: “I’m open to the idea of a relationship, but like I said I’m picky”. It’s a lie of omission, I know, because she is probably thinking of a conventional, monogamous relationship. But then again, it’s the truth: I am willing to see girls again if I like them enough.

Why so K at 22? Dare I say it: a strong family unit? Perhaps. She’s studying architecture which is a real subject: more K. She’s doing a year long internship before returning for her masters. More K. She was wearing a lot of rings and bracelets, which is usually an r sign, but they had meaning as some of them were from her family and one was from a childhood friend. No tattoos. K. But I think I know the ace in the hole, because I’ve lived through it myself: weight loss. She said she used to weigh more but now she looks like an average weight. When you’re overweight, and you forgo intimate relationships, you start to fantasise about romance. Maybe she’s a virgin. Just a theory.

Let’s see if she responds to my date closure ping. I joked about how I only ate meat and potatoes, so I referenced that in it. I’m fairly sure she likes me based on the hand hold, and there was the fact that she fidgeted with her bracelets and rings while we talked (a sign of sexual energy). She mirrored my body language too and the way I sat. Oh, and one more thing, her answer to this question:

“So what did you like about me?”

“Well, your height is good, and I liked how you were very straightforward. And also, I like your ginger quality.”

The attraction is there, it just depends on whether she’s willing to risk me pumping and dumping her, which honestly isn’t my intention. My plan at the moment, which is of course massively dependent on her responding to my ping, is to kiss her on the second date and go for the lay on the third. I’m going to try and keep the intermediate dates short though, I’ve got a feeling this girl just needs to tick off her checkboxes before she hops in the sack. Let’s see what happens.

Yours unfaithfully,

Thomas Crown