I’m sitting in my living room with my dressing gown on, having just returned from the last session of my mini Game holiday (you can see my thoughts from the midway point here). Since then, I’ve done another 36 sets and collected 8 more phone numbers, giving me the following total:
Around 1 in 5 is fine at this time of year, but as I discussed before, my problem was the strength of leads. None of the closes have lead to dates so far. That’s a bummer, considering that I usually can get a date per 20 approaches, but there’s always difference in time of the day, and, most importantly, vibe, to consider. As the two weeks have progressed I’ve found that my vibe was much better in the past few days and has led to a few mental breakthroughs and some stronger leads.
The first breakthrough might sound obvious, but it’s that “Daygame should be fun”. I’ve heard this from the start but always considered it as normative advice; given the amount of airtime “vibe free pickup” gets I assumed it meant that it didn’t have to be fun. However, now I can appreciate that something important is missing if it isn’t. That “should” is actually prescriptive, and emphasises the fact that you’re sweeping her up into your world and your good vibe. Practically, that’s led me to look back at Daygame Nitro and implement the word association vibing described there. Then once I know she’s attracted, it’s time to “be real” and have a more mundane everyday conversation.
The second breakthrough comes from recording my sets for the first time. It was odd to begin with, I felt AA just like I was a beginner again, but after the first day of recording it went on autopilot just like everything else. It’s one of the things I wish I had done sooner. It reminds me of exactly a year ago when I was studying for an exam and also had two weeks off work. I promised myself that I would go out in the grounds of Crown Plaza and just do three approaches. Each day I would return home and write down what I did well, and what to improve on. It’s the short and intense learning periods like this which form the 20% of action leading to the 80% of results.
To record myself, all I needed was my old iPod Touch and a pair of headphones with a microphone. I then fed the headphones up through my t-shirt and let them dangle down the front, using the inbuilt voice memo app to record on. Apart from the obligatory click-clack-clunk you hear during an approach, the sound quality is more than good enough.
I went home and analysed what I had said, ironing out the kinks. As I said previously, some of the AA came back, but also like a beginner, there was the added bonus that each set offered a learning opportunity. In particular I noticed that I needed to swap out the “yeh?”’s with more thoughtful “hmm”’s and “uhuh”’s. Recording also reminded me of each set so I could troubleshoot any non-verbal issues I remembered.
The first was to do with eye contact. I had forgotten to give the girl laser eyes as I wheeled in front of her to root her to the spot. Another eye contact aspect I needed to remember (also picked up from Nitro), was the progression of her eye contact from social, to challenging, to submissive. In the past I’ve often opened girls who seem to give really bad eye contact, which I misconstrued as her being a No girl.
The second was with regards to plowing and hindbrain/forebrain conflicts. I hadn’t fully realised that when a girl’s actions seem disjointed (facing you and slowly moving away, but unsure of it) that you are watching this conflict in action. I’ve learned to plow in these moments because they seem to offer the strongest leads. I imagine that her hook pointed becomes highlighted in her mind such that when she looks back on the interaction, she remembers making an active choice to stay. In the past I often would have let her go because plowing seemed like a lot of effort for a low probability girl. In truth, her body was begging me to plow so that her hindbrain could carry the day.
The other interesting mental breakthrough that recording myself had was me truly believing in my ability to Daygame. You can look at your phone at the numbers you’ve collected, and that gives you an idea, but when you actually hear yourself doing it you realise that you aren’t making any of the mistakes that coaches warn you against. In fact, you’re actually pretty good; and can feel the smoothness and competence with which you execute the model. It reminds you that what you’re offering is filet mignon compared to the McDonald’s cheeseburger she normally gets when a guy tries to chat her up on the street.
Who knew that recording yourself was such a great inner Game tool?