Today’s post is all about post-sex interviews (PSIs). I received this email a few days ago and thought it would be a great opportunity to knock out a post to be released on Bank Holiday Monday when I’d actually like to be taking a day off. I’m writing this on the morning of Saturday 3rd but need to keep up my three per week routine.
Please continue to send in questions by mail and through Twitter. It’s a win-win. You get your questions answered and I get content ideas.
The post-sex interview is the set of questions you ask after sex where you can find out what the girl really thinks. At this point in time there’s a special honesty window that opens up where the girl will feel safe to express her thoughts and feelings on matters which she wouldn’t ever bring up publicly.
I guess that it’s a heady combination of hormones (such as oxytocin) and her feeling safe in her vulnerability which allows this. The guy will have calmed down too and can set aside all the posturing that happens before sex. He becomes more relaxed and so it’s a productive environment.
You can find examples of real life PSIs in my book and tonnes inside Krauser and Torero’s memoirs, which is where I found the inspiration for the kind of questions I like to ask. Then over time I asked more questions as I thought of them.
In terms of how I get a PSI started I don’t do anything special. I’ll normally go into it with something like this:
“So…,” [pause], “when did you know you wanted to have sex with me?”
I’ll say that with a kind of self-referential vanity which I use throughout my dates.
She’ll then answer the question and probably turn it back to me. And from there I’ll go off into some other questions and play a kind of Questions Game. The back and forth nature should stop it from feeling like an interview and to be honest she’ll probably be excited to find out the same stuff from you too. Consider it a win-win honesty free-for-all.
However, note that if she doesn’t want to play ball with your questions then feel free to drop the PSI so as not to sour the mood. There’ll always be chances for more PSIs later on in your career.
Though I don’t ask many questions such as these nowadays they are very helpful for a guy to accept some Red Pill truths. A lot of what’s said in a PSI is brutally honest and you’re at the best point to receive it: just after getting your lay. At that point you’re feeling victorious and so some harsh truths aren’t going to bring you down. I recommend beginners and intermediates do a PSI after each lay at least until they start hearing the same answers again and again.
Here are ten questions I can think of asking in a PSI. I wouldn’t ask them all at once but try out different ones over time to find out what girls really think. Please leave more in the comments below if you have any. The usual answers I get are in square brackets:
- When did you know you wanted to have sex with me? [after some specific bold escalation move]
- When did you know I wanted to have sex with you? [straight away]
- What do you think of guys approaching you in the street? [that most guys do it in a very boring and basic way: they approach, say she looks hot and then ask for her number.]
- What did you like about my approach? [normally that I came up with a pretense to talk to her other than hotness i.e. whatever the tease was]
- How many guys are chasing you right now? [multiple: from university, apps and work]
- What’s your sexual fantasy? [examples include outdoor sex, extreme domination, etc. Read a bit of My Secret Garden by Nancy Friday to see the kind of crazy fantasies some girls have]
- What messages do guys normally send you? (followed up by: “show me some.”) [Lame ones]
- How many guys have you been with before? [varies depending on whether she’s more K or r-selected. I’ve banged virgins all the way up to girls with astronomical lay counts]
- Have you ever had sex with other girls / been in threesomes / foursomes / moresomes? [she says yes more often than you expect]
- Do you enjoy being dominated? [nearly always yes]
That should give you some fun info to play with.