#77: Ice Cream Man

I met Lara a few weeks ago after work. It was one of those times where I had a pocketful of leads (of which none worked out) and so had set myself the simple task of just doing a set. I figured that that would keep me ticking over and I could at least tell myself I had been out. I walked from Tottenham Court Road towards Oxford Circus, and who would I run into but Kaiser, who was also out for a session. We met, chatted, and agreed to wing for a bit, before turning around and heading back up towards Tottenham Court Road.

I saw Lara coming towards us. 21 years old, slightly taller than average, hourglass figure, cute, Dutch. A seven. I didn’t get an IOI but I got the feeling that she was more of the creative sort, and so I turned to Kaiser and let him know I’d go off and “do that one.” That would be my one set done. Mission accomplished. I went back up the street and Lara stopped immediately. I teased her for her fluffy jacket, saying it reminded me of Bane from The Dark Knight Rises. The rest of the set went smoothly and I could tell she was interested. I took her number.

I sent my feeler later that evening and BAM! There was her reply. She was one of those nanosecond responders. It was good to start with, but then I realised that it would always put the ball straight back into my court. Sometimes I just wanted a rest! We easily agreed to meet later that week for a drink.

When the day rolled around I met her and led her over to a pub for a couple of drinks. Kissed her easily. Played the Questions Game. She was quite open. I started to think it was definitely on. Though I may have misread the situation slightly, given that she was quite open about everything. But then she threw a spanner in the works: “I’ve never just gone home with a guy before,” she told me. I took it in my stride as she was simply trying to save face, and I did get her home, but it was a near miss. She wouldn’t give it up. Fair play to her.

Then we went into a mini-text hell. She responded to my message the next day, in nanoseconds yet again. Phew, I thought to myself, I thought I’d overcooked that one. But then when I went to set up the second date: silence. I assumed that as shit had become real that she’d darted. But she did end up getting back to me, weakly, and said that she would only come out if she felt “well enough.” She mentioned cramps at some point within the next day and so I put two and two together: she was on her period.

She flaked on the day of the proposed second meeting, but I simply told myself to keep on pushing. The worst thing I could do at this point was to burn the lead because I was getting irritated. And it wasn’t long until I had my next opportunity.

I rolled off for 24 hours after the date flake, completely ignoring a banal ping she sent me, and reengaged. This time, though, I would take longer to respond to her, always wrote less than her and stuck to teasing so as to keep the vibe up and show my disapproval for her flaking.

My opportunity came quickly. She mentioned how it was so hot and that she had ice cream in the freezer. I jokingly asked when I could come eat it. She didn’t react negatively to that, which was very important. She said that the local area was really busy because of football, and so I suggested we meet the next day.

“What are we going to do?” she asked.

“Ice cream and a movie at mine,” I replied, buoyed on by her previous reaction.

She told me she wouldn’t be able to stay for long, and on the day literally messaged me saying “I don’t really feel comfortable with having sex yet” but it didn’t faze me. She was coming directly to my place anyway.

We met at the station again and went straight back to mine. There was no LMR.


But the best thing was that she didn’t actually eat any of my ice cream. More for me.

Yours unfaithfully,

Thomas Crown

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