What is the best way to increase constantly the quality of girls your sleeping with?
This was one of the questions that came from my coaching clients and I had enough to say to turn it into a full-length post.
First we need to start with a disclaimer: there is a cap to how well you can do and it’s up to you to find that (and today’s post will hopefully help you with that). The SMP matches high value men with high value women and so if you’re going to get girls who offer more value to you, then you will need to offer more value for them in exchange. Therefore, if there’s a cap to how much value you can offer, then there is a cap to what you can expect in return.
Next, as many have said before me: the fuck-ladder is real. If you are consistently banging sixes then the next step is the high sixes, then the low sevens, then the solid/medium sevens, then the high sevens, etc. Think about getting better in those terms: low, medium and high.
You should also start by knowing what your level is. I think that, roughly, guys who are past their first 1000 sets should have a multiplier of no more than five, on average. That means one lay in five (first) dates, one date from five numbers/social medias, and one number/social media from five approaches. All told, that is one lay in 125 approaches. If you are doing worse than that then consider lowering your targeted quality, to begin with.
Now let’s get started properly.
I see guys as being in one of two camps. Either:
- You could be doing better than you already are, without changing your SMV or environment, or,
- You’re getting the best you can already and want to improve that
Starting with the first camp: you simply need to start approaching hotter girls and get over the new wave of rejection. If you want some encouragement to do so, just remember how you already surmounted various obstacles to reach where you are now. By doing an increasing proportion of your sets on hotter girls your anxiety in approaching them will diminish. It isn’t typical AA, but instead more of a background anxiety which is acting as a barrier to your charisma.
Doing these sets will also help you to spot the signals that they give off. This is a particular problem for if you become interested in pre-approach calibration and end up looking for more and more signal. The unfortunate byproduct of improving your pre-approach is you start seeing more girls as probable-instant blowouts, whereas in reality some of those girls will like you. Therefore it is better to accept some blowouts as a result of widening your net, rather than missing those opportunities.
As you take more of these girls’ numbers, and eventually go on dates and get laid with them, you’ll build reference experiences and your vibe around them will automatically be better. Furthermore, it should put you in some more interesting date situations which you will need to learn to overcome. The added benefit is that when you approach girls of your current quality, then you will be more charismatic with them and your vibe will be better.
Now onto the second camp. If you’re already getting the best that you think is possible either for your own SMV or your current environment, then you will need to change that. Improve your SMV by becoming better looking (increasing your muscle mass and getting lean: I recommend trying to get to at least 15% bodyfat) and improve your Game by making a concerted effort to get better, and not just hoping it does. Take an inventory of your life and eliminate any sources of bad vibe. Lastly, work on your charisma and try to increase your power, presence and warmth.
You can also change your environment: go somewhere you are considered exotic or of higher status; go somewhere where the local genetics are a complement to yours; go somewhere where the SMP favours women less, and men more. In all these examples you are going somewhere where your helicopter-dropped SMV is going to put you in a higher percentile compared to your home city.
Lastly you can be girl-specific, and polarise your style and approach more. If you can be exactly a girl’s type, then she is going to perceive your SMV to be higher. This will enable you to attract the hotter girls of that subset who value whatever it is you’re emphasising.
And for both camps: try to surround yourself with guys who are getting higher quality than you. Look at the pictures they show you and mentally compare them to the girls that you are getting. It will probably make you envious and annoyed, but you can then transform that negative energy into a positive purpose, and let it drive you into the sets with the hotter girls. Yes, I am telling you to purposefully beat yourself up over it.
Yours unfaithfully,
Thomas Crown
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