#85-88: Clumpiness

Merry Christmas! This will be my last post of 2021 and it’s another lazy collection of lay reports, similar to the one that I wrote for September.

These four lays (one Bar Game and three Daygame) all came from October, making it another stellar month. In September’s post I highlighted that just because I’d had five lays in a month, it didn’t make me the King of Daygame. In just shows that luck sometimes pulls in your favour. In this post, I want to highlight the clumpiness of results.

This year I hit my long standing aim of 12 Daygame lays on average, per year*, but the results came in a far from consistent manner. One came in April, three came in June, five in September and three in October. My results were very clumpy this year and you should watch out for and prepare for clumpiness in your own Daygame. You should be ready for the fact that your vibe goes up and down, and lays tend to come along like London buses.

* I have an aim of 12 Daygame lays per year so that I don’t ride the hedonic treadmill of always wanting more lays. This seems to be the best approach for my own satisfaction with my results from Game. Of course, if I were to get more than that, then I wouldn’t be displeased. If I get less than that, I can console myself with the fact that it’s on average and things even themselves out.

Throughout the year I’ve been referring to cycles of Daygame and that “first you don’t get any numbers, then you get flakey numbers, then you get sludgey numbers, then you get slutty numbers.” That saying accurately described my year and I knew to look out for a change in the nature of the numbers I was getting. If the nature of the numbers changed then I roughly knew I was in an uptick in vibe and that results would be coming soon. This really helped me to get through the barren stretches and while in the upswings I had a feeling that I could take a number from any set I went into. Then I’d spend a bit of time in the “slutty numbers” phase, where I could generate leads as quickly as I was closing them / they flaked, but soon enough I’d be back to square one: the point where I had no live leads in my phone and had to get out there and start the cycle anew.

Different guys will spend a different amount of time in each phase. In fact, one of the many (many) ways you might describe the spectrum of beginner to advanced would be the time they spend in each phase. A beginner might only spend an afternoon in the slutty numbers phase (being in state) before going back to another month of flakey numbers. Or an intermediate/advanced guy might take better advantage of the upswing and not be bothered so much by the down.

Now on with the lay reports.


I was walking on Regent’s Street with Mr White when Jane walked past us and gave me an IOI. Mr White had planned on doing the set but pointed out the IOI to me and so I ran off to do it. Jane was 21 years old, Egyptian and was a part time student, part time athlete; a seven. She stopped straight away but wouldn’t allow me to get very close to her, though she did giggle at everything I said and when I spiked the conversation she seemed to rock backwards and forwards in a certain way that told me she had a lot of pent up energy. Jane told me she was just walking around and so proceeding to the i-date was the obvious choice.

We went to the Argyle Arms and had a short drink. I escalated a little bit but I really just wanted to calm things down and get some comfort in. About two thirds of the way through the drink I was thinking about where to bounce her to next, when she said she’d never been to Camden. That was a great excuse to suggest we go there and she agreed straight away. Game on.

We got into Camden and had a couple of drinks there. I kissed her over the first and then played the Questions Game where I found out that she was a virgin. She asked me when I had lost mine and so I told her the story of my first, before linking it into how I had taken a couple of virginities myself and how it was important that it was with an older guy who knew what he was doing.

The conversation turned to films and so I suggested we go to watch one at mine, to which she agreed. We went to mine, I put on the film and patiently got the +1.

The above report was barely 300 words but it really was that straightforward. I saw how she reacted to me on the street and found that her logistics were clear, so I moved forwards to the SDL attempt. This is probably one of the cases where her being a virgin went in my favour because it acted as a pressure cooker (as Torero would have said). At a certain point a girl’s virginity becomes a burden to her, rather than a virtue, and she might tell herself that the next competent guy she comes across she’ll lose it to him.

P.S. Throughout the i-date I noticed that Jane was messaging a guy on her phone a lot, and that he had a heart next to his name. Savage.

P.P.S: a couple of days later I got a message on Instagram from an anonymous account who had written a message saying “u fuckin pussy. I know what u did. What’s your fuckin address you slimey piece of shit.” Naturally I took a screenshot and then blocked him. Though I don’t know how the person found my Instagram because I never gave it to Jane. Maybe she got it via some Instagram-phone-number-linkage-voodoo-magic and then wouldn’t give the guy my number, but did give him the IG? Or maybe it’s just some white knight / purity fantasy Manosphere troll. Who knows.


I was fishing in Carnaby with Kaiser, Mr White and Bro (given the name due to his inordinate use of the word) when I saw Jane turning off of the street. I figured that since she was so tall (6”1’) that it would be a good in. I proved to be right, though she was “only a six,” and it was a very fizzy set with lots of jokes. I took her number and came back and told everyone “that was definitely a lay.”

There was some near egg-on-face here because she didn’t respond to my feeler and took more than 24 hours to respond to my follow up (I always send a low investment feeler and then a regular ping the next day, even if she doesn’t respond to the feeler, just because I don’t put a question in my feelers). Texting was decidedly sludgey for the next few days, where she would take full days to respond, but then something suddenly clicked and she went slutty, agreeing to meet for a date. All the banter came back too. I don’t think it was an issue of horniness and instead simply that she had been busy and her schedule had cleared up.

I thought that the lay was very much on. I find that if it takes a while to get a girl out that it’s either dead in the water, or a straightforward lay: sometimes a girl will respond politely to you for a while and then would feel guilty/rude to turn down your date request. She then comes out for a timewaster date for the sake of her manners. That or her schedule clears, she’s suddenly become horny, or any other reason, and she comes out and it’s an easy home run. This was one of those occasions and I could sense it.

I met Jane and it was very straightforward. Two drinks, two venues. Bounce to mine. No LMR. +1.


Kaiser opened a two-set outside a bar in Soho. Myself, Mr White and Bro (it happened to be the same crew that night) wandered over to wing him. Unfortunately she was only with one friend (Jane, another six unfortunately) and so we just tried to occupy her attention so that Kaiser got some one-on-one time with his girl.

They seemed to be getting on well but said that they were going to go home. I took that as an opportunity to try and extend the set and bounce them to another bar, saying that they couldn’t go home without having had a quick drink there first, and they seemed to agree. Mr White and Bro had had enough and so headed home themselves and so Kaiser, the two girls and I headed off. Oddly enough as we got closer to the next bar, Kaiser’s girl said she was going to go home, but encouraged me and Jane to go on. I’d later find out that Jane had recently broken up with her boyfriend, but that Kaiser’s girl was engaged. They’d just come out to get Jane to meet a guy. Kaiser’s girl went home and so did he, and so we headed over to the bar.

We had a drink, but then some random American tourists started talking to us (this is part of why I hate Bar Game/Nightgame). They didn’t get the hint and wouldn’t leave us alone, following us from that bar (when it shut) to the next one. Eventually they left us alone and I kissed Jane, but I could sense that she was holding something back (this was before I knew about the break up). I tried to get her back to mine but she wouldn’t come, and so I took her number.

Fast forward a few weeks later and I met her near mine. Her texting had been stop-start, and a couple of times I had rolled off a couple of days and then reengaged, but she’d always respond eventually and then to my old message too.

She said she was low on funds and so it was simple to grab a bottle of wine and go drink in a nice nearby outdoor area on a few seats. I could tell she wanted a lot of comfort given her break-up so that she didn’t feel like a slut and so I let her dig into my life story.

We finished the first bottle and it was easy to suggest drinking another back at mine. We got back to mine and I started to escalate but she was hesitant. She pulled away and started to refer to her break up and how she still had to get over it. I fractionated away, sat back and told her about I didn’t have any “expectations” for today (I specifically used that word because it seems to make something tick in a girl’s head), that it’s natural that a guy wants to have sex but if she didn’t want to then it was no big deal. Then I used the pink elephants trick and told her to not think about sex – that it was very wrong – in a tongue in cheek way. That seemed to work and it demonstrated to her that I was non-needy while planting the seed of having sex in her mind (like inception; in-sex-tion, perhaps?). She then asked when my flatmates would be back (which is practically the same as if a girl asks if you have condoms). +1.


I was winging with Kaiser on Oxford Street and he pointed out Jane: a student, early twenties (23, I think), a seven. I gave chase and stopped her; she later told me that just from looking at me that she knew I would go and talk to her. We bantered a bit – she had been walking so fast that I teased her for being the white Usain Bolt – and I took her number.

Kaiser and I continued our session and stopped off for a snack at Sainsbury’s. Who should be walking by but Jane, as I stuffed reduced price slices of beef into my mouth. That provided some excellent food for my feeler text as suggested by Kaiser: “Well now you know what a dinner date like me would look like!” I feel like the lay was won then and there. Honestly, I don’t know a better DHV than eating end of the line meat outside of a supermarket.

We met for a drink a few days later and the good banter continued, but she wouldn’t let me kiss her. Later on, in her own words, she “wanted to make sure I wasn’t a serial killer first.” Fair enough.

We continued messaging and I got her back out later that week. Though she still wouldn’t let me kiss her, I could feel that the date was on, and eventually she told me she just didn’t like PDA. That was fine with me, I knew I just needed to push forward.

We went to a second bar, had one drink there, and then I bounced her back to mine. Minimal LMR, and really it was just that she wanted to pause at each stage of escalation to make me wait. +1.

Yours unfaithfully,

Thomas Crown

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