Q&A: How Do You Get Good at Daygame Fast?

I recently recorded a podcast with Mario Tubone who you can find on Twitter @MarioTheDom. Here’s the link to the podcast. I hope you enjoy it.

The conversation was free-flowing so we didn’t always stop to finalise answers on the different topics we covered so I thought I’d write a post to do that to keep everything in one, neat resource. I’ll put this post up in my Beginner Daygame Advice section because it should be a useful resource for anyone getting into Daygame.

If you would start from zero and your social skills and game tactics reset, what would you do to learn fast?

How quickly you can get good at Daygame is hugely dependent on where you start out. If you’re already successful with women, have a good job, are in good health and are tall, muscular and you have a symmetrical face (good looking all around) – you’re a great catch already and a solid 8/10 – then becoming good at Daygame might only take a week or a month as you get past the oddity that is approaching a girl in the daytime. On the flipside, if you’re the complete opposite of what I’ve described above, then it’s going to take a long, long time to get good at Daygame as you work through improving your looks and your Game, overcoming your AA and dealing with your Inner Game issues. As Mario said on the podcast, suddenly those “1000 sets of hell” might become 1500, 2000 or even more.

Then there’s the guys in between and those who I believe stand to benefit the most from learning Game: the guys who for one reason or another never did well with girls; maybe they lacked confidence; maybe they lacked the technical know-how; maybe they had a particular Inner Game issues. Whatever the issue is/was, they have decent potential with women that only needs to be unlocked.

Realistically, this post is aimed at these guys: those who are somewhere between a 5.5 and 7.5 SMV all told (looks plus status plus pre-existing charisma/Game/attractive behaviours). The already-attractive guys just need to do the stuff below so they get into the rhythm of approaching. The unfortunately-unattractive will need to do more than the below to improve their looks and Inner Game.

With all that said, this post would more accurately be titled “What Is The Fastest Way To Get Good At Daygame?”

(If there are any extra tips you think I missed out from this list then please leave them in the comments as they will be helpful for future beginners)

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First here are a couple of traits/mindsets:

Consistency: this is probably the most important trait you can have if you want to get good fast. Too many guys go hard for a week and then lose momentum and fall off the wagon: it’s the Daygame equivalent of yo-yo dieting.

Take the pressure off: your only aim at any time is to surmount the next step. Try to take the pressure off of yourself as much as you can. Don’t try to control a thousand moving pieces at once and focus on the fundamentals. Trust that your Daygame muscle is growing as you’re going through this process even though you can’t see or feel it yet.

Now literally what to do:

Work your way up to doing 25 to 30 sets a week: a set counts as anytime you walk up to a girl and try to start a conversation where you have the intent of letting her know you find her attractive. That means hit and run compliments count. Full-blown sets count, of course. Having a social conversation but then putting a compliment at the end counts as well.

Work your way up to those 25 to 30 sets gradually by reading the beginner’s advice in my recent post on how to get over the mentality of bothering a girl while approaching her (link here). You might start this journey by only being able to ask for directions then having social conversations, but over time make more of your interactions sets. Remember, take the pressure off! It’s okay to start small and grow from there.

Split your 25 to 30 sets up over three to four sessions: don’t do two massive sessions on the weekend and then spend the rest of the week dreading having to reconquer your AA. Try your best to spread the sessions throughout the week. NOTE: even if you have the time for more than four sessions and can do way more than 30 sets per week, don’t do that: you’ll become so desensitised to approaching that you’ll come off as robotic and women can tell with these things. It’s better that you keep this activity mildly uncomfortable for your body so you create a bit of authentic nervousness.

Get a good wing: the best way to get a (good) wing is to watch who’s approaching in the street and then politely go and talk to them and see if you get on. You can also try internet forums and Telegram groups, though the risk of finding a weirdo there is higher. You can also try my Find A Wing page (link here). Once you’ve found a good wing, then hold onto them for dear life. Treasure the relationship. I had a great wing during my first year of Daygame and us pushing each other into sets and keeping each other accountable was a massive help.

Focus on the fundamentals: go ahead and watch the beginner Daygame videos (I linked to two on the main Beginner Daygame Advice page of this blog) but keep your focus on the fundamentals. It’s better to do the approach without thinking than to get lost in a “what do I do/say” rabbit hole and not do it.

The fundamentals, in my opinion, are: 1) do a good stop with solid eye contact which you hold throughout the opener; 2) stand upright with open body language, 3) speak at a measured pace; 4) give a strong compliment and try to make it specific to what you really do like about her; 5) cover these three conversation topics: where she’s from, what she’s doing right now and what her job is (or what she studies if she’s a student); and 6), give another strong compliment and ask for her number.

Doing the above should keep your focus on what’s most important: your vibe and non-verbals.

Keep a journal: after each session, write down two things you did well and one thing to improve next time. Focus solely on that one improvement in the next session. Other things will fall by the wayside as you move your focus from one point to the next but over time everything will get better.

Work in 200 set chunks and keep stats: in your first 200 sets, only measure the number of approaches. After that, measure how many contact details you collect, the number of dates you go on and the number of lays. Work out the ratio between each metric: approach:number, number:date and date:lay and compare them between each 200 set chunk. NOTE: do not bother yourself with approach:lay because there will probably be a high variation in chunk to chunk.

Be your own coach: read Nick Krauser’s Daygame Mastery as a review of intermediate Daygame after having done your first 200 sets. Then actually do your homework. If you have a particular issue then work out what you need to change and put it into practice. Don’t merely hope that you’ll get better. If you can’t work out what you’re doing wrong then hire a coach but it is not necessary; for example, I never had any coaching.

Be social: Daygame tends to attract more introverts because they prefer talking to girls one-to-one, but it pays to be generally more social with people than you are now as it will build your vibe and get you into the swing of talking to people in your daily life. It’s as simple as saying “Hi, how’s it going?” or “Hey, how’s your day?” to any barista, cashier, colleague, etc that you come across.

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I hope those all helped and once again I’d ask that you put any further suggestions in the comments below.

Yours unfaithfully,

Thomas Crown

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